That Time That They Tried To Silence Me.
Today I road around. Not because I didn't have anything else to do or because I was bored but I just felt the need to ride around. I was headed to workout and took a detour because my mind was full of consuming thoughts that would have come between me and every machine I tried to touch at the gym. So, I was driving in my car for a good hour and a half until I convinced myself to go home. As I filtered through all of my thoughts one thought at a time one specific thought keep circling itself into my mind:
I will not be silenced.
People have always told me, why are you dressed up? Why do you dress like that? Why are you laughing so loud? You are so country, you should learn to speak properly. Why do you cry all of the time? You are too nice and you give to others too much. These are all things that, as the years have passed me by, I have allowed to silence my speech. These comments may seem very small to many of you all, but for me after hearing it for an ample amount of time it began to shape the way I approached every part of my life. And not in an positive and impactful way.
Long story short, I began to allow the words of others to silence the way that I felt, the way that I dressed, the way that I cared for others and even the way that I spoke and laughed. Silly, I know but whoever said that words don't hurt straight up lied to me and tried to "sike" my mind from believing the truth. Well the truth is, that I am a human and I have emotions at feel just like any other person. And guess what? Words do hurt! They hurt worse than someone dragging me on the floor, to be honest. The Bible says that words can speak either life or death into someone life.
But then, I realized something. That I will not be silenced. Especially when it concerns who I am and who I am becoming.
One day, I had a moment that I did not feel like myself. I was not joyful I did not feel happy, I just felt like blah. I literally took a moment and thought about something so silly that it made me laugh. I continued to laugh. Continued to laugh at what seemed like nothing until I felt the energy rise from the depths of my soul because I was longing for that joy that I knew that I had inside of myself. I was not going to be silenced.
In the end of the day I realized it was not what other people said to me or about me, yet I was hindering myself all along. I was allowing myself to be silenced. I was my own limitation. I tell people all of the time that the only thing limiting you is you. No one can put words in your mind unless you allow them to stay in your mind and no one can silence you unless you choose to be silenced. It is all a choice, and be the choice you choose for yourself.
Be encouraged lovely! Comment below and share.
If there are any specific topics you want me to talk about let me know below!
XOXO, Ericka Warnita